Sex Advice

Dear Dr. Locker: Help! I've had very little sexual experience and have started dating a woman who's very experienced. Should I tell her?

Answer from Dr. Locker

Confessing to your lack of experience is probably a good idea, and here's why: If you keep mum and your performance ends up being sub-par, then she may assume that you're "bad in bed" versus just inexperienced. By telling her, you and she can work together to discover what you can do to be a great lover. She may even enjoy finding out you're a sexual novice, since you come across as a nice guy who she gets all to herself. You can play up this angle by telling her it was your choice to not sleep around, explaining "I've had my opportunities, but I don't like having sex with someone unless it's serious." This statement will make her feel like a million bucks—and you haven't even hit the mattress yet! The bottom line is, wowing someone in bed comes down to feeling close to your partner, and keeping an open, eager-to-please attitude. And that's something you don't get from a plethora of sexual partners.


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