April, 2009

How can families have the birth that is best for them without a hospital dictating the process? Ricki Lake and Abby Epstein will enlighten you!

Your Best Birth: Know All Your Options, Discover the Natural Choices, and Take Back the Birth Experience, by Ricki Lake and Abby Epstein will be published on May 1, this Friday.

In the 90s, I loved being a guest on Ricki’s daytime talk show. She was always a generous host, and it was fun to be a part of her show — especially when Ricki would ask a provocative question and the whole audience would chant, “Go Ricki. Go Ricki.” I’ve also long been a fan of her acting, and I’m looking forward to seeing her in her newest role as host of VH1’s Charm School (premiering May 11). Yet, it’s the work she does to support women’s choices about childbirth that is most extraordinary.

Ricki is truly dedicated to teaching women about childbirth and about how to be advocates for our health and wellbeing. Her new book Your Best Birth, and her phenomenal must-see documentary The Business of Being Born, are also an exploration of her own development as a woman and mother. In both the book and the documentary, Ricki and co-author Abby detail the births of their children, providing a personal, moving angle to their well researched and thoughtful work. Then they explain how a woman can decide to have a home birth, natural child birth in a hospital or birthing center, or if epidural, induction, medical intervention, or cesarean section could be necessary. Ricki and Abby give women an understanding of the natural birth process, as well as the medical system, including why our country has such a high rate of cesarean sections and infant mortality. Their new book gives women the necessary information to make an informed choice about their birth experience.

No matter what stage you are in the cycle of life — pregnant, soon-to-be, been-there-done-that, or who-knows-when-or-if — this book is a wonderful read. Ricki empowers us all to take responsibility for the choices we make about how we bring children into the world. Pick up Your Best Birth on amazon.com. Oh, and if you haven’t yet seen The Business of Being Born, you simply must! It’s available on amazon as a DVD or video-on-demand. You will be inspired by Ricki’s work. I know I am.

Welcome to new readers of my blog!

If you arrived at my blog because it is now being carried on your local news website (in Chicago, Ft. Lauderdale, Orlando, Baltimore, Cleveland, Kansas City, Hartford, Denver, St. Louis, Oklahoma City, Philly, and more cities…), I’d like to welcome you!  I’m excited that my blog is carried in so many places, and I’m very glad that you’re here. Please take a look around at all of the Categories in my blog. In addition, you may like the most popular areas on my website 1) my sex and relationship advice area, where you can search for answers to many questions or get your personal sex questions answered for free – and 2) my articles, where there’s always something to learn about sex. Please bookmark my site, or get my RSS feed to stay up on all of the latest about sex, relationships, and my work in sex ed and on television. I will be adding exciting new areas to my site soon, too. Thanks, and I hope you visit my site lots!

Last week on CNN HLN with Mike Galanos, I discussed Carlie Beck, the 20 year old cheerleading coach who was fired from Casa Roble High School in Orangevale, California, after it was revealed that she posed nude for Playboy’s website as a “Playboy Cyber Girl of the Week.” Well, now she’s moving up. It was just announced that she will be “Playboy Cyber Girl of the Month for June.”

On CNN HLN, I discussed both sides of the issue of her firing. Carlie has every right to pose nude, if that’s what she wants to do. She seemingly tried to separate her high school coaching from her nude modeling, since she used a different last name to pose — Carlie Christine — and the nude pictures are only available with a credit card. On the other hand, teens must be taught to not pose for risqué or nude photos, and that anything they put online can have serious consequences. So, their cheerleading coach obviously was sending the wrong message to her cheerleaders. Also, since one of the cheerleaders knew about the pictures and told the principal, then Carlie must have told that cheerleader about it. It is highly unlike that one of her students would have just happened onto the photos, because they were posted on an interior page of the site amid dozens of 1 inch square images of other nude women.  So if Carlie told the students where to look that would have been inappropriate.  

The moral of the story, however, is not about whether her firing was right or wrong. It’s that the firing made her “famous.” Instead of illustrating how nude pictures can hurt someone’s life, now Carlie gets exactly what she wants. She wanted to be a well-known model, which is why she posed nude. If she hadn’t been fired, then no one would have noticed her nude pictures in the sea of other pictorials of attractive nude 20 year olds. Now she’ll be the girl of the month, instead of just the girl of the week. All her dreams are coming true, thanks to the scorned cheerleader who precipitated her firing.  If she gets her way, then by next year, she may even get into the actual Playboy magazine! Maybe she’ll aim even higher and strive to be the next “Girl Next Door,” and move in with Hef. Wonder what message that would give the girls she used to coach.

In the “Articles” section of my website, I have written an article about How to Use Household Objects as Sex Toys. Please click here to read it.

You may also enjoy the “Advice” section of my website, where I answered a question about Do It Yourself Sex Toys. Click here to here to go there.

Your lips touch for the first time: The earth moves. The angels sing, or, at least, that’s what you hope will happen, right? Read on for tips for an amazing first kiss.

I wrote the following article about first kisses for Match dot com a few years ago, and it was recently republished on MSN dot com. I’ve been getting tons of email from people who enjoyed the article. I’ve also been asked to talk about it on the syndicated radio show, “The Ralphie Show” in Providence, RI, Scranton, PA, and Wilkes-Barre, PA. So, I thought I’d repost it here. It begins after the jump. Please feel free to leave your comments about your favorite first kisses.

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I joined forces with Durex, The Body Shop, MTV Networks International, the MTV Staying Alive Foundation, singer Solange Knowles, and The Naked Cowboy to raise awareness about HIV/AIDS and to promote safer sex. Yesterday, we launched the new campaign, “Say yes, yes, yes to safe sex,” and introduced The Body Shop’s new Tantalizing Lip Butter. Five dollars of each sold goes to the MTV Staying Alive Foundation to support HIV/AIDS education for young people around the world. Durex donated 100,000 condoms which were distributed in Times Square.

The launch event began at a swanky loft in Soho. Solange Knowles spoke about HIV prevention and the need for more education for teens about safer sex. She also discussed how President Obama has inspired her to help others. Solange was poised, well spoken and lovely. I spoke about safer sex, including the fact that there are over 33 million people living with HIV and AIDS around the world. I also mentioned that according to the Durex survey, sixty percent of people say that even though they know about the risks of contracting HIV from sex, they still do not always use protection. There’s no reason to say “no” to condoms, because today new thinner condoms (such as Sensi-Thin and Extra Sensitive) feel better than condoms have ever felt. Also, there are many ways to integrate condoms into lovemaking, so that they can even spice up people’s sex lives, which, of course, I detail in my book.

We reassembled in Times Square where models wearing “yes, yes, yes” pajamas distributed Durex condoms. The Naked Cowboy, who played a “yes, yes, yes” labeled guitar, attracted tons of attention as he sang a little ditty about safer sex: “If you don’t want to mess with HIV, then join The Body Shop and MTV. Say yes, yes, yes to safe sex with me.” He sang this same song over and over for hours. (Although, I swear that once I heard him sing, “If you don’t want to masturbate, then say yes to safe sex with me.”)

It was a great day for HIV/AIDS education in NYC.