Posts Tagged ‘sex advice’

My Advice column on this site has new sex questions and my answers three times a week.

Here’s a recent Q & A from my Advice column:

Dear Dr. Locker, If I use a vibrator all the time, will it make sex less enjoyable for me?

Dr. Locker Says: Yes and no. If a woman relies on a vibrator in order to orgasm every time, then she may not be able to orgasm any other way — because her body gets so used to the electric stimulation. Will this make sex less enjoyable for you? Well, no, if you and your partner don’t mind that you’ll have to use the vibrator every time you want to orgasm when you are intimate. But if you want to be able to orgasm while you and your partner are being sexual, without having to use a vibrator, then you would most likely need to entirely stop using the vibrator to get over it, and to re-sensitive your body to your hand (or his hand, or rubbing on his body, or oral sex) in order to orgasm. It’s all a matter of what you find most enjoyable.

For many more sex questions and answers, browse or search my Advice column.

This Saturday night, Feb. 14, after you’ve exchanged heart shaped cards, candy and flowers, will you be having Valentine’s sex?  For many couples who have been together for y-e-a-r-s even the “excuse” of Valentine’s Day may not be enough to boost the excitement in their sex lives. That’s why you may want to give a small, inexpensive sexy toy to your lover to use for Valentine’s night. Here are two of the best sexy (but non-threatening) new toys.

Quiver Freezable Lubricant Cubes: Cubes of water-based lubricant that you freeze and then they melt on contact. Experimenting with different temperature can be sexy. You can act out the sex scene from 9 1/2 Weeks, by rubbing the frozen lube cube all over your partner’s body. It will be a cool treat for Valentine’s night. (About $6.99 for a box of 6 cubes)

Play Vibrations: Vibrating Ring. Exciting, discreet sex toy for couples to use together. He puts the ring on the base of his penis, and she can feel the mini-vibrator on her clitoris. Some women can orgasm this way during intercourse. (About $7.99 for one ring, which has an off-on switch for multiple uses of up to a total of 20 minutes of vibrations.)

Valentine’s Day provides the permission for you to give something like this. So enjoy spicing up your sex life this weekend.

This morning, I was on 98.5 FM WNCX Cleveland’s classic rock station (via phone), talking about the Durex Sexual Wellbeing Global Survey findings about orgasms. One of the findings is that only 36% of American women say that they “almost always” orgasm during sex, as opposed to 83% of American men who say that they “almost always” orgasm during sex. It’s more difficult for women to orgasm during sex, because most women need clitoral stimulation in order to orgasm, and they don’t always get it during intercourse. I discuss this more in my advice area here, and there I give details about what women can do to have an easier time achieving orgasm during sex. Many women who have a tough time orgasming during sex may enjoy having their orgasm before or after intercourse. That might make their sex life completely content! Yet, interestingly, according to the survey, 58% of people who said that they “usually” achieve orgasm during sex said that they were “content” with the emotional aspect of their sex life, compared with 29% of those who “rarely” orgasm during sex.

Today, I updated the “Questions of the Week” in my SEX ADVICE COLUMN .  Please check it out!

I updated the “Questions of the Week” in my sex advice column today (as I do every Monday, Wednesday, Friday). This week, there are new questions about nipples, sexually transmitted infections, the G-spot for men, and more. To find hundreds of other sex and relationship questions and my answers, be sure to “search” the archives of my sex advice column. Also, from that page you can ”submit” your own questions for me to answer. Enjoy!

 (This photo was taken for my book “Sari Says.” Blouse: Pucci. Pants: H&M. Feather Pencil and Toe Rings: Claires. Authentic Egg Chair from the 1960s: Awesome!)

Posted by Dr. Sari Locker

In the other Sept. 08 Cosmo article that I am quoted in – “100 Crazy Sex Questions: Answered in 20 Words or Less” (p. 146-149) – I was asked to write exactly 20 words each to answer thirteen sex questions. Compulsive, but fun. Also, it was challenging to answer accurately enough in exactly 20 words. (This is what a “sex expert” does for fun on a Friday night.) Here are the questions they sent, with the actual 20-word answers I wrote.  (more…)